denys - a dedication to muhd. imran
If you had actually bothered to read Imran's post, you would have noticed that he had a little comic commentary about the various personalities that constitute our class. While I think they are all fine and dandy and really quite amusing (with the exception of #7, which I will declare blasphemy), we must remember that our mini-celebrity (Imran himself) would be excluded if government intervention fails to occur! So without further ado, I present to youA tribute to Imran
O, where can I possibly start? Those bulging soccer balls and that earnest sex drive that has earned him the prestigious title of buaya? Or perhaps those luscious lips that should be used for Pizza Hut's stuffed crust commercials? Ah, I'll start with the "phases". Imran has three dominant personality "phases" that are utilized every day. (every ardent fan should remember these. so pay attention, all 4 of you out there.)
a) The "I didn't get into RJ! Boo hoo hoo." phase, which can be identified with a slight pout of the lower lip and the tendency to make fun of and lambast everybody that he sees, or at least those not going by the name of Divyesh, who could and would crush him like a cockroach.
b) The "I'm trying to play basketball lar!" phase, which is characterized by a furrow of the inner eyebrows and the habitual biting of people that come too near him (as Divyesh can faithfully attest). Other key signs that this phase is active would be the launching of 3-pointers that would hit more air than inside Andrew's head, and fierce drives to the basket that would often see the basketball ricochet off the board and back into Imran's face.
c) The "Gavin Degraw" look, which lays dormant within Imran and only surfaces when the pop hit "I Don't Wanna Be" is blasted out in a T block classroom. This phase is, without a doubt, the most dangerous Imran phase, but if you skillfully dodge flying tables and chairs on a regular basis then feel free to play this song as often as you can.
If you haven't been swept off your feet by the charming description of the Imran, read on! (alternatively, wait a decade or so till Imran gets his dream job, and he'll do it for you) You lucky girls (and boys, with Imran there are definitely no guarantees) would be glad to know that Imran is still blissfully unattached! Unfortunately, according to reliable sources such as Fauxnatism, he has the strictest of requirements when it comes to his life partner. You have to be a 88-26-33, be stinking rich and go by the name of Fiona Xie. (too bad Anne Nicole Smith outlived the dinosaurs, or she would be quite ideal too)
But hark! A recent poll (regarding Imran's most possible partner) by yours truly showed that majority of the people that know Imran single out a "10 ton anchor" as the entity that Imran would most likely be attached to, with a knuckle sandwich made by Chef Le Muthu Menon a close second.
That brings to a close the first and probably only episode of "A Tribute to Imran". We hope you have enjoyed this production. Anyway, Bertrand has informed me that simplya53@gmail.com is up, so you can use http://yousendit.com to send in your class photos! =)
This has been a Denys production
